Archive for November, 2006
Thursday, November 30th, 2006
Discovery Blastoff
by Andrew Koop
OA Snippet
Charlotte contorted her face in horror. Her mind clicked into overdrive. What looked like pain on her face was actually disgust, mingled with relief. Facial expressions are often misconstrued. Charlotte, or Cherri as many called her, used this to her utmost advantage.
Sharise continued her rhythmic ride on top of Feensley’s large, jiggling [...]
No Comments » - Tags: excerpt, koop by Andrew Koop
Wednesday, November 29th, 2006
Interlude
“Yeah, I spent eighteen months in Nam.”
“What did you do there,” I asked.
“I killed people.”
I didn’t know what to say, I had never heard anybody admit to killing people before. But Rich was not just anybody, he was different; always quiet and reserved, he always kept to himself even when the bar was crowded [...]
1 Comment » - Tags: klassen, war by Robert Klassen
Tuesday, November 28th, 2006
Appointment
by Andrew Koop
An Excerpt from Overcoming Adam
Dr. Feensley entered his office and flipped the lights on. “What a great meeting,” said Feensley aloud. He sat down in his chair with a magnanimous thud.
“Good morning, Doug,” said Sharise as she entered the room. “Excellent sermon Saturday…it made me feel so alive.”
Her pale skin glistened as she [...]
No Comments » - Tags: excerpt, koop by Andrew Koop
Monday, November 27th, 2006
Graham Cracker
He told stories; nobody listened. His hair already gray. He wore tidy English corduroys.
He skipped in the park, made obtuse remarks.
You punched him. Ouch.
No Comments » - Tags: koop by Andrew Koop
Sunday, November 26th, 2006
Propranolol
James arrived at the Washington-Dulles airport still wearing his uniform. Dusty rocks and shrapnel slid to and fro in his duffel bag. His sunburnt, windblown skin still ached despite repeated aloe applications. He held a collage of grieving tears at bay — smiling at his family and their joy.
Months later he woke up naked in [...]
No Comments » - Tags: drugs, hallucinigens, iraq, koop, numbness, ptsd by Andrew Koop
Tuesday, November 21st, 2006
Leverage
by Andrew Koop
Concept by BWC
Elizabeth had always wanted a big diamond since as long as she could remember. She gazed down at it now and wept.
She knew what she had to do. The ring slid off her finger — a perfect fit. The pawn shop wouldn’t give her any grief. Joe had always liked her. [...]
No Comments » - Tags: bwc, cold, frostbite, koop, snowboard, surgery by Andrew Koop
Tuesday, November 21st, 2006
Atheism and Insomnia
Alex lay in bed staring at the black ceiling as he had numerous nights before. Usually, he scurried around the house finishing as many self-imposed chores as possible until he fell into bed and passed out from exhaustion. Sometimes he preferred to watch movies into the wee hours of the night. He drifted off to [...]
3 Comments » - Tags: Mauney by Max Mauney
Monday, November 20th, 2006
Make Me a Channel of Your Piece
Oh, Saint Metzler, blessed father of hobby, deliver us wood, so that we may build.
You giveth not a dull knife, and carry not one. Blessed be and forgive our enemies, for they not know what they sell.
Deliver us from toys, and forgive those who mix dope and foam. Gaze down upon us with your reading [...]
2 Comments » - Tags: doug by Buddy
Sunday, November 19th, 2006
The Hobbytown Massacre
The party was definitely over. Glenn Scott Clarksmith had forgotten to take his medication. Larry was pissed. Eric used to be a doctor. The past tense did not affect his performance. He sedated Glen Scott quite easily. So easily, in fact, he had it done in less than a [...]
1 Comment » - Tags: doug by Buddy
Saturday, November 18th, 2006
Muddy Buddy
by Andrew Koop
Creslin Johns sat cozily reclined in front of the television. He was impatiently sucking down his steaming Hungry Man dinner when he heard a rustling outside. His motion detector bulb flickered on and off. A drop of hot gravy sizzled down from his chin and onto his lap. He grabbed a rifle from [...]
1 Comment » - Tags: dark, koop by Andrew Koop
Thursday, November 16th, 2006
Hugo Chumley
My given name is Hugo, but I changed it to Ray Liotta. It’s a big kick at the cop conventions. Someday I’ll make the force. But now? I’m takin’ it easy. Livin’ in Miami and partying with all the fine ladies. I’ve got a brand new moustache — named it Trevor.
Trevor and I usually hit [...]
No Comments » - Tags: beach, cops, florida, koop, miami, moustache, police by Andrew Koop
Wednesday, November 15th, 2006
Diary of Ms. Van Tassel
by Abby Koop
October 11, 1816
Dear Diary,
Abraham stopped by for a chat again today. His horse ride here had given him a sort of stormy, unrefined look, and yet he still managed to maintain a perfectly graceful sort of aura. When I told him so, his face turned bright red.
I am quite certain I strike [...]
1 Comment » - Tags: abby by Abby Koop
Tuesday, November 14th, 2006
Evening
. . . . .. A sunny summer Saturday in the Sunshine State held to its reputation until evening when M. and T. met with A. and her childhood sweetheart now spouse. M. was asked to pull together an appropriate fetish outfit with very little notice and a lot of anxiety. A serendipitously packed shiny [...]
2 Comments » - Tags: pajeez by Micheal Wood
Tuesday, November 14th, 2006
Nuclear Products
by Andrew Koop
Critically acclaimed Flemish nuclear physicist Basti Valentino loved the little particular things in life. Maybe it’s because he was big — Seven foot, six to be exact.
It was his healthy obsessive compulsive disorder that led him to Lancaster County, Pennsylvania. His highly promising, award winning research on cold fusion had come to a [...]
1 Comment » - Tags: koop, physics by Andrew Koop
Monday, November 13th, 2006
Cold Feet
by Andrew Koop
Inspired by the BWC
Chad woke up in the dark. He managed a moan — the brilliant moonlight shimmered off the snow and into his watering eyes. Then he remembered: the expert slope.
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP THERE, CHAD!?” screamed Mrs. Johnswick.
“I’m totally going to wail on this hill, Mom!” He rolled up the [...]
2 Comments » - Tags: bwc, koop by Andrew Koop
Saturday, November 11th, 2006
Moons Over Thurzday Scramble on Friday
Greetings Marshanners,
Today’s word is and ancient one from the Hicko scrolls.
!NAHESDK TI
Hint: disheartening acknowledgement of failure by a third party
Hint: words uttered by a famous play by play announcer
No Comments » - by Buddy
Thursday, November 9th, 2006
Young Sally, Young Billy
Sally and Billy Whitebread hung their heads.
“But, Rummy is my Godfather!” whined Billy.
“Who will teach those extremists a lesson?” wondered Sally.
“I dunno.” he moped. “I can’t believe they are so convinced about their religion that they bomb us over there. What did we good Christians ever do to them?”
TELEVISION PLAYING IN BACKGROUND
A guided missile took [...]
1 Comment » - Tags: koop by Andrew Koop
Tuesday, November 7th, 2006
Me & Ted:
by Max Mauney
Me & Ted: Selected Short Stories of Self-Loathing v.1
Last stretch of the run.
As Caleb approached the rotting hollow pine, he knew it would only take him about 3 ½ minutes to reach the end of the trail. He dialed his mp3 player over the song. He always ended his run [...]
1 Comment » - Tags: Mauney by Max Mauney
Tuesday, November 7th, 2006
In the Bush
Dick and the gang had just finished their git’n’R-DUN GOP rally tour. They were rolling along singing dixie when Dick got a hankerin’ for some duck.
“Over there!” he snarled. The driver of the gas guzzling carbon monster swerved across two lanes of traffic and into the Tennessee thicket. Rummaging through the row of seats behind [...]
2 Comments » - Tags: koop by Andrew Koop
Monday, November 6th, 2006
Storage
Woke up in a giant vacuum.
The machine hum between my ears was unbearable. Darkness lurked all around. Through the auditory debris, I could hear things breaking…things falling. Small animals — somehwere — were scurrying.
A small beam of dusty light shot through a crack in what must have been a window. I scrambled to my supposed [...]
1 Comment » - Tags: koop by Andrew Koop
Saturday, November 4th, 2006
Moons Over Thurzday Scramble
by Doug Ullrich
Welcome, Marshanners! It’s Thursday!!
Here is your word (or words).
Hicko used to bark out this one during one of his most violent and spastic of dance routines…….
OTLTA ICTNOOPR ERLSVERA
Hint 1. Horrible sounding, unnatural scientific occurence.
Hint 2. Bill Murray
2 Comments » - by Buddy
Saturday, November 4th, 2006
Hickopedia Marshannika
by Douglas Ullrich
How do you like the hobby called Marshann so far? Marshanning began along time ago at a place called Hensley Morsel just south of Bent Armpit, Wyoming. A group of severely lexicdis beardos were bored with there leisure activities of yodeling and scab collecting. One beardo had the spiritual fortitude [...]
No Comments » - by Buddy
Thursday, November 2nd, 2006
All Aboard
I’d taken the lowest garbage fare I could find. Local airports aren’t cheap. They squeezed me into the way-back — the row of seats behind beverage station. Front-row seat for the mile-high club…
I couldn’t take my eyes off the young woman hobbling her skirt back down. That is, until the plane shifted. It wasn’t like [...]
